Tips for moms

ometimes life runs ahead of us at 100 kilometres per hour and we struggle to keep up.

Here are a few tips I found helpful on staying on the road and in the running for God’s gift as a mother. (these come out of A mom after God’s own heart by Elizabeth George)

1.      Take time to nurture your heart.

You can only teach what you know; you can only teach faith by showing faith. Faith can only be had if we spend time nurturing ourselves (sometimes your quiet time will be on the floor with kids all over you but so be it, take the time, they need to see you do it too)

2.      Teach your children God’s word.

As we learn the verses we can teach our children to remember them with us.

3.      Talk to your children about God

Talk to them not just about what He is, but Who He is.

4.      Tell your children about Jesus

Tell them about Jesus and everything He did, and how much it all means.

5.      Train your children in God’s ways

This is fairly easy; His laws are what we need to teach our children and not the laws of the world.

6.      Take care of your children

Again do the best you can, give them your whole heart and take the time to give the hug when needed.(or even when it’s not)

7.      Take your children to church

8.      Teach your children to pray

Talking to God will help them feel connected to him, praying is not a difficult thing but it is extremely powerful.

9.      Try your best

God expects nothing more from you!

10.   Talk to God about your children.

You can share with Him too, about everything.

These are fairly simply guidelines but our lives sometimes interrupt our routines and we get side tracked.  I am merely posting this as a reminder for us all.

Sometimes our quiet times are spent in between doing dishes or in the car on the way to work, but we have to remember that our children need to see us practice it too, not just as a family but in private too. This helps them understand the position in your life too and not just as lessons for them to learn.  God is not an institution but a life line.  Some have not accepted his blessings yet, but we can show our children that we have and teach them the blessing they are and we receive as a family.  The little hugs and kisses and talks die too quickly as sincere talks and turn into a role that must be played out of responsibility.

Enjoy sharing His love with yourself and your family.

Life's Highway

We all plan our lives and live it according to what we feel we want out of it.

I have seen many things lately which show that we tend to feel life is out of our control.  Yes there is a destiny that we have and we can only control so much.  My question is this, is the frustration and turmoil worth it all?

Yes we can control life in the choices we make but it does throw us a curve ball every so often. I am not saying give up control at all, I am saying we need to concentrate on that which we can control, like our decisions and let the rest go. We need to stop worrying about things we hear might happen and only worry about them once they actually happen. Cross the bridge when you get there.

Things we can control:

Our emotions – we can choose our outlook on life and our outlook will affect our emotions. We choose every second whether something is going to bother us or whether we will ignore it. We choose to see the negative or the positive in a situation.  Once we have conditioned ourselves to look only at the positive, life will be so much brighter! When our emotions are under control, the mountains don’t seem like the same mountains we see when we are frazzled and stressed.

Our Time- Most times we can choose how to use our time. I have found that the more we do, the more we are able to do. You will find that when most of your time is spent on quality not quantity, this also leads to more feelings of fulfilment. Is it really necessary to wash the clothes now, when the kids want to play, or do dishes when hubby wants to watch a movie? Prioritising will show you how you can eliminate time wasters and concentrate where you can gain precious time needed.

Our mental wellbeing: we need to concentrate on relaxing and doing stuff we enjoy, To break the monotony of everyday life. We need to take time to prioritise our lives and ourselves. Take time to congratulate yourself on a job/project or something that you have done well. Go get that manicure or facial or read that book you have been wanting too.  We too often wait for other people to show appreciation when we don’t even show it to ourselves.

So take the time to organize chaos and turn it into managed chaos!

Woman of the House

 This is a fairly long one which I am going to try my best to compress as much as possible.

As the woman of the house we have so many roles to fulfil.

·        Homemaker

·        Accountant

·        Cook

·        Cleaner

·        Mistress

Now we add a family or children to the mix and you get

·        All of the above

·        Nurse

·        Teacher

·        Friend

·        Jungle gym

·        Doctor

·        mother

Luckily for us, we are woman which is only a couple letters short of SUPER woman!

Valentine’s Day is not just on the 14^th of Feb. It is everyday of the year! We don’t give our husbands credit because they don’t appreciate us. We don’t accept help because we try to convince people we are super moms. In my case I don’t go to the doctor when I am ill, because moms don’t get sick – there is no time for being sick.  Needless to say I was very ill and had to realize AGAIN that I am not super mom.  It is okay to ask someone to watch the kids for an hour so you can nap or go to a coffee shop to have a coffee alone and in peace! Yes I repeat it is ok.

I have found not through just the studying but experiments and experience that the more we accept help, the better we become. The more we praise our partners, the more they praise us, and will therefore be much more willing to help us in return again.  Men try to hide their emotions as we well know but they are extremely dependant on feelings of pride and sufficiency towards us.  They thrive on knowing we think they are good enough, they are the ONE for us, and they are what we need and that they can provide it for us.  Take this away and you will have endless problems. Men have 1 or 2 reasons for being, to be able to provide for his family, so there is nothing lacking and secondly to be his wife’s hero.

So my theory is this, make your man believe like you do, that he is good enough for you. Thank him for all the care he takes of you and the family and how he provides. (It is always good to list what you are grateful for from time to time) Show him how much he means to you – Yes girl you know what I mean!  

The more we give of what we want the more of it we will get back. Begging a man for something is definitely not the way to go.  And remember that they were born with a wild heart...to hunt and the have adventure and our current lifestyles do not allow them to have these emotions. So we should grant them the time to get these things, like allowing them to do the things we fear for them for.

So if you want to feel loved and appreciated – show your hubby how much he is, he will give you points for this, and in return do it unto you tenfold.

Self Perception

This is mainly for the women but the men who read it may understand us a little better.

We, as women, always look at ourselves critically; we cannot see what other people see in us.  Whether it be good traits, being pretty or looking good.  We always sell ourselves short. Examples like My hips are too big, My chest too small, my legs to thick or thin. There is someone who has no bum and wants one or has back problems etc.

We must remember that God made us PERFECT.  He does not make something that is anything but perfect. He does not make mistakes. Even though we might not think so, there is always someone who desires something that we have, whether it is a talent, our looks, or a personality trait.  There is always someone who wants something we have.

So why do we sell ourselves short?

I believe we have been indoctrinated by times and especially the media to have the perfect face and body. We listen to men comment on girls and wish we could get the same responses. (I believe behind our backs we do, but we will never hear about it). We need to behave in front of our own man in such a manner as to get those looks and comments. (Maybe just keep it behind closed doors, this will also prove an immense self esteem boost)

The solution?

I think the solution is to concentrate on inner beauty. Outer beauty is all superficial and fades with age in any way. Where inner beauty will be remembered long after we are gone.  This will also shine through and make us more beautiful on the inside. So it’s a win win situation.  I am not saying let yourself go. Do take care of your body; go buy yourself that sexy lingerie you have always wanted.  It does help with a self esteem boost.  As the saying goes when you feel beautiful you look beautiful, this in turn gives you confidence which makes you even more beautiful. Make a note of the compliments you do get and concentrate on remembering them!

So to each and every woman out there I want to say this: Remember you might not like how you look but there is always someone else who wants to look like you! Be proud of who you are and the rest will follow!

Gossip

I was recently asked what my opinions are about gossip. I sat down and started thinking about the deeper than obvious answer “I don’t like it when people gossip”. What is the reason for this, do you think? Well here is my summary:

Firstly let’s classify gossiping:  I believe gossiping is anything that you will not say to the person you are discussing’s face. This may be because of their reaction, because it is a secret or malicious intent. Thus if you can’t say it directly to that person, don’t say it at all.

When we gossip, the person we are gossiping too, knows we cannot be trusted.  We immediately expect that the person will do the same to us. 

Secondly when we gossip it is 9 times out of 10, that the other person is being criticized. This might make us feel better but has no good repercussions.  Sometimes one little sentence may have severely dire consequences, when they push the other person over the edge.

If we criticize no good can come from it, but when we discuss things in a positive manner rather than criticizing, too often than not, we will see a dramatic change in the reaction of other people. When we gossip or criticize people become reluctant to share things with us, they become distrustful towards us.

There is a phrase that goes: Judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who you are.

We damage the connections we have with our friends as they see us being polite and then when someone has left the conversation turn on them.  This proves to them that we cannot be trusted and generally the other person will immediately suspect us of gossiping about them too. So it starts a vicious cycle of distrust and dishonesty.  We can easily discuss something with the person if we just choose more positive words rather than bad mouthing a person.

With gossiping we generally wear a mask to hide our true self from the other person. On this I have only a little point I would like to raise.  If you have to wear a mask, have to pretend to be something you are not, why are you wasting time with someone who doesn’t accept you for who you are? Shouldn’t your friends love you for you and not what you pretend to be?

Remember next time you want to say something bad, would you say it to that person?

Consider life.

I have finished and incredible story this weekend which really got me thinking! So once the wheels start turning I end up here.


We live our lives in such a rushed manner, though we have hundreds of gadgets and things that are supposed to help save us time. We can cook a nice dinner in an hour where years ago it took hours to cook it over the fire or in a wood stocked oven. We have gadgets that keep us in touch with everyone, yet do we speak to the people we care about that often?

 Everyone has some problem or the other, which to each of us seems like we are trying to move a mountain. Yet there are problems that are real problems, like where is your next meal coming from? Are you wearing the only shirt you own?  If you are reading this the answer is probably no.  We have more clothes than we need; we have food to fill our bellies, but don’t know how to survive on just a cracker and jerky for example.

 I remember a time when I had to steal food to survive, my family can confirm the state I was in (although I hid it best I could) but we become complacent so quickly.  Do we really need so many clothes, toys, DVD’s etc?  The answer I believe is the following.  The obvious answer is NO.  Media and society has made it a requirement. You must have the nicest clothes, the nice car and we look to each other’s things to judge them and validate ourselves.  I have once again realized that though this is how it is done, we must remember that this is the wrong way!

We must validate ourselves and people by who they are not what they wear or own.  For those who know me, you’ll know I get underestimated a lot, due to my size and voice.  I am slowly but surely learning to let my soul seep through and shine as bright as it can.  I tend to wear my life and heart on my sleeve.  This is not something many people in our society still do, because we all have to be heroes.

We judge ourselves by what we own, and make debt to get the best which in turn gives us major problems.  I feel these problems are our own fault because we have lost our “respect” for money.  I use this word lightly as I am struggling to find a better one.  Money has started to rule us and our lives instead of us using it as a way to get what we need to survive.  What we have should be sufficient as it is all material, none of it can go to heaven.  It is our soul that goes to heaven.


Should we not take greater care of that? Are the souls of our friends and family not so much more important?  Should the love we have in a family and friends not be enough to make us happy?  When we pour ourselves out completely onto the people we love our lives become so full, we don’t need so much of the material stuff to fill the voids that are left when we do not share the amazing bond a family has.

 If our souls are strong and filled to the brim does anything else matter?  I believe the answer to this is also NO. Nothing else matters because we will see the good around us, share our burdens and be able to share life, this will leave behind a legacy none of us can comprehend with all the footsteps we would have engrained in the lives of the people around us.

 My challenge for you is this:  Feed your soul, your heart not your life.

Connect to those around you.

Don’t allow life to rush you by and take back control of life so you can live it.

May each and everyone take stock of your blessing and see even more on a daily basis!

Are you on the Right track?

We all know we hold our future in the palms of our own hands. Sometimes however life throws us a curve ball and it feels like life is spinning out of control.

Sometimes we have to let it be, sometimes we have to “jump back on the horse and reel in the reigns” if you will.

We generally get what we give in life, but sometimes there is the rare occasion where we have to analyze what we are giving and getting back. IE in a business venture does it give the returns you have hoped for, or in a relationship – do you get the respect or love that you give?

Once this has been analyzed, we are sometimes faced with hard decisions not only about ourselves but our lives as well.  We need to take a deep hard look at ourselves, our actions, our results as well as every person in our lives.  If something doesn’t contribute to your life, is it something you should have in your life?

These are hard questions that need honest answers but after time usually bear fruit.  These fruit can appear quickly but sometimes the flowers don’t seem as sweet as the fruit.

This evaluation of your life can have a great impact, as many of us avoid it until something very serious happens, sometimes this might be too late.

Take the time to prioritize the things in your life.

Ensure you are getting what you deserve versus what you put in.

Leave the negative things behind and concentrate on building your happy future!